Santa gives but he also takes away

Santa is watching ... and judging.

Friends with school-aged kids have told me that Santa is worth milking for all he is worth. Apparently nothing gets your toddler to behave like the threat that Santa is always watching and may decide at the drop of a hat to cancel Christmas at your house. For a generous man kids seem to believe he is also quite judgey.

(When you think about it, it sends a pretty bad message - generosity comes with conditions and all that. Best not to think about it then!)

But I have just been let in on another secret -- Santa also takes stuff away!

One family I know is spreading the word that Santa is collecting dummies this year. They plan to make a big deal of leaving the dummies under the tree and the ever-helpful North Polian will whisk them away.

At another house he is collecting bottles (not the beer kind) and I'm now sure that he is collecting all manner of objects across the country.

Stickybeak is a little too young to try this on this year but I will be keeping this knowledge up my sleeve for next year!

And for those families giving it a go I really hope the solution is as easy at it sounds otherwise it could be a traumatic Chrissy. The family removing the dummies are actually throwing them away so the parents can't cave in -- a brave move indeed. My fingers are crossed.

And I'm wishing you all a very merry Christmas -- you might have a sleepless night ahead but those smiles will be worth it in the morning!

-- Natalie xx

photo credit: Joriel "Joz" Jimenez via photopin cc

Welcome to toddlerhood

I thought toddlerhood had begun when we put up safety gates throughout the house. But funnily enough many of those gates didn't last long - Stickybeak soon hated being confined to a room and besides he fairly quickly mastered getting up and down split levels.

So most of the gates are gone now, except those at the top and bottom of the staircase (they will be around for awhile methinks, we have an old terrace with ridiculously steep stairs).

Fast forward a few months and his coordination and curiosity have come along in leaps and bounds. And I have realised those 'c' words together mark the beginning of toddlerhood and not the actual toddling like you might expect.

Stickybeak can now not only run from room to room but can also open drawers, pull open cupboard doors and can empty a book shelf in record time (toddler Olympics anyone?).

After walking into a room too many times to discover the floor covered in items that were once tucked away we realised we needed drawer and door fasteners.

So now our house is in full lock down. And THIS is what tells me we have entered toddlerhood. (The tantrums were a bit of a giveaway too).

-- Natalie

If you can't say something nice...

Walking to the park this morning I was trailing behind two new parents who were out with their baby and their grandmother. The mum was carrying the young bub in the ergobaby carrier and was the very picture of health and happiness.

Just as I was admiring how at ease and capable she looked (and wistfully remembering the ergobaby days) the grandmother, who I think was her mother-in-law, turned to her and said, "You won't be able to do that much longer."

And my heart sank.

I have often been on the receiving end of a statement like that and it sucks. Yes it's fairly mild as criticisms go but as a new parent it stings and it further reinforces the feeling that you are being judged. The mum might have looked capable but I bet inside all she really needed to hear was something positive and encouraging. Why do so many older mums/grandmothers forget that?

Those first few months are tough. Just getting out of the house by a reasonable hour is difficult and every outing comes with much pre-planning and troubleshooting (drive or walk, how close is parking, pram or carrier, will there be stairs, etc etc). Now throw in an outing with your mother-in-law where your new-found and unformed parenting skills are up for scrutiny and it's a challenge.

I imagine for the grandmother that baby carriers are an odd sight but instead of saying "how wonderful that you can carry the baby that way" or "that's a nifty device, the baby isn't too heavy for you is he?", or something of the like, which would have displayed interest and caring and possibly opened up a conversation, she instead only offered negativity.

As for the response, determined to keep it upbeat the mum responded: "Then I guess we'll use the backpack."

And that shut the MIL up.

-- Natalie

Cat and Toddlers

Source: kanaes.com via What Mummy Did on Pinterest

Teaching Moment: Patting a Cat

Before I had my two little boys I had my 'other two boys'.

My rather large boys cats answer mostly to Argo and Finlay - but mainly they answer to the sound of biscuits hitting their food bowl.

Argo is very handsome and refuses to believe he is indeed a cat. Finlay is secretly a grumpy old man in a grey fur coat who has an aversion to anyone under 2 foot. They were our 'babies' and as such they were constantly showered with love and affection, especially from GeekDad, who at the time thought they could do no wrong.

And then we did the unthinkable we brought home another baby to add to our family. And everything changed.

CheekyMonkey consumed every hour of our day in those first few months; there was simply no time for cuddles on the couch, sleeping late on our bed or helping GeekDad play his favourite game into the wee hours of the morning. It was offical they were now 'persona no gratis'.

They declared war making it quite clear they would not accept this new title without a good fight. They proceeded to adopt their own version of torture sleep deprivation tactics by crying and scratching our bedroom door insessantly throughout the night asking for more food, water, love or my personal favourite because they could.

Undeterred we stayed strong (to this day I'm not sure how, as we were extremely sleep deprived) but eventually the cats realised the following:

a) CheekyMonkey was a permanent guest not on loan,

b) Mum and Dad would not be relenting anytime soon to the No Bed Rule and

c) The No Bed Rule also meant the No Couch Rule if CheekyMonkey was couch bound.

And lets face it in the first months I'm pretty sure I spent 90% of the time on the couch, if not breastfeeding them pumping away in the vain hope my milk supply would increase. Which only left the carpet or the top of the TV (we still had the biggest CRT TV Monitor back then) as a place to lick their wounded souls and shoot me the occasional death stare. I say 'me', because they were relunctant to make GeekDad the bad guy just yet.

They soon cottoned on to that fact that if I was up in the wee hours feeding CheekyMonkey they too could have a midnight feed if they limited the pestering to a bare minimum. I must give them credit for waiting until I had enhaled enough chocolate to feed a small army before assaulting me as I made my way back to bed.

In those first few months the cats kept a respectful distance from CheekyMonkey wary of the little being who made alot of noise.

But as our son began to spend more time on the floor I knew the time had come for the entire family to commit to a healthy relationship of tolerance and respect.*

The first step required CheekyMonkey and the cats acknowledging the others existance

And so let the lessons commence!

Step 1. Slowly approach the cat and offer your hand up for a sniff.

Step 2. Once the cat sniffs your hand you can go in for a pat.

As this was not recorded for posterity lets try and capture the spirit of how this step recently unfolded as DreamBaby learns to pat Argo.

Me: "Bubs be gentle"

"GENTLE......GENNNNNTTTTTTTLLLLLLLE"

DreamBaby:  Grabs a handful of fur a little too tightly.

Argo the Cat: "MEOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW"

DreamBaby:  "BWAHH BWAHH BWAHHHHHH"

Me:  "Ohhhhhhh ......... (insert your favourite swear word and you get the picture)"

Teaching your baby to pat gently and not grab a fistful of fur is one thing but teaching your toddler head butting may not be the best way to get your cats attentions will no doubt fall on deaf ears.

Because really who wouldn't want to rumble with an 8 kilo grey fuzzy ball of fluff if you had the chance.

-- Hannah

CheekyMonkey snapped in his new Batman T-shirt

Batman has entered the building.

CheekMonkey proudly showing his new Batman T-shirt created by yours truly.