Having a baby is painful, we all know that. I pretty much spent most of my adult years dreading the inevitable pain of childbirth. In fact, strangely enough the only time I haven't been afraid of labour pain was during pregnancy (see my earlier post on baby brain).
So imagine my surprise when I realised that for me the most painful part of having a baby wasn't the actual having a baby part. Hard to believe isn't it? I remember a midwife in our parenting classes trying to reassure the scared mummies-to-be by saying that, yes, labour pains are bad but they only last for a day. Apparently that was meant to make us feel better. But for some reason we couldn't get past the day's worth of intense pain part!
Well, it turns out she had a point. In my case it was nearly two days but let's not quibble because the bottom line is correct. You'll see what I mean.
Here is a list of the pains that I experienced bringing a baby into the world. Some of them I expected, but most of them I didn't. Consider yourselves warned!
* Labour. Yes, it hurts. A lot. I did most of my labouring at home (not my intention!) which means I missed out on an epidural and pethadine. I did score some gas in the last couple of hours though, which was great. Even though it hurts like hell it's the knowledge that it isn't coming back that makes all the difference. Unless I decide to have baby number two of course (ha!).
* Delivery. A different kind of pain. When I think back on delivery what I remember most is what an effort it was pushing a baby out, not how painful it was. Funnily enough they are two different things. That said, I was lucky that my delivery was fairly short. If it had dragged on then I'm sure it wouldn't take long for the effort to be, well, too much of an effort.
But these pains I expected. Everyone expects labour and delivery to be painful. But here are the ones I didn't expect:
* Stitches. Surely after labour and delivery I wouldn't be bothered by a few stitches. Wrong! I didn't feel the actual tear but I did feel the stitches going in. The pain was much sharper than delivery, which was not what I expected (thank god for the gas machine!). I still cringe thinking about it. And then of course we need to include the recovery time as well ... but enough about that!
* Neck ache. Now this one took me by surprise, and it's quite sweet actually. This was from spending the first few days staring down at little Stickybeak. I couldn't take my eyes off him. When I told Noisy Daddy he said he had a sore neck too, which was also sweet. This one is easy to fix but it means you have to stop staring at your brand new perfect baby and who wants to do that? Next time I'm getting a masseuse to swing by the hospital room.
* Sore legs. I must have used my legs a lot during labour because they ached for a few days afterwards. This was fairly minor on the pain scale.
* Nipple cripple. I expected breastfeeding to be hard, I had been to the classes and could see that getting your baby to latch on could be tricky, but what I didn't expect was for it to be so painful. We're talking bloody and scabby. It was a few weeks at least before Stickybeak latching on stopped curling my toes and bringing tears to my eyes. It might only last 30 seconds but it is hell! And considering you are breastfeeding 6-8 times a day, both sides, that's not an insignificant amount of pain. Long after the latching pain went away the general soreness remained. I think somewhere around 3 months it all came together and became a pleasant experience, one that I now love.
By now I had been putting up with various pains for a couple of months so it was beginning to feel like the post-baby horrors were never going to end. (See what I mean about labour at least only being short term and one-off?). And I haven't even got to my number one pain yet! So without further ado:
*Wrist pain. Of the shooting, stabbing variety running through my hands, especially across my thumbs. This takes out the dubious honours not because it is the most painful but because it has been the most debilitating, most expensive and has lasted the longest (five months and counting).
Apparently this injury is common for new mums because looking after a baby involves a lot of wrist action. Unavoidable wrist action, which is exacerbated by the fact that we still have the relaxin hormone running around our bodies.
The main causes are from cradling the baby's head, especially when you pick him up out of the cot, lifting his head when changing outfits, raising the legs and bottom when changing nappies (at least 10 times a day in the early weeks), and supporting his neck when bathing. But without a doubt the number one culprit for me was holding Stickybeak's head in place while breastfeeding him. Without realising it, I was locking my wrist in a painful position for more than 20 minutes at a time.
I put up with it for a few months hoping it would naturally go away but it just got worse. I visited an osteopath and did massaging and stretching but it didn't really help and I didn't have the time or energy to spend on the exercises. In the meantime, holding my baby was painful and came with the added fear that I might drop him. Six months later I finally bit the bullet and got cortisone injections and went to see a physio. The cortisone took the pain away so now I can hold Stickybeak again without fear, which came just in time because he has turned into quite the wriggler! The physio normally would recommend splints but as she said it just isn't practical when you are taking care of a baby -- you need to be able to move your wrists -- but I am back to doing stretching exercises, which I will be doing daily for a long time to come.
And after all of this I am told the pain isn't over yet. From all accounts when my baby gets bigger I can expect back pain, mainly from getting him out of the cot and in and out of the car seat. Over and over and over again.
And to think I spent all those years worrying about labour pains!
Were there any unexpected post-baby pains for you? What ranks as your number one?
